My Existential Rantings

Toby is not evil

I got it! Episode 3x8 - Toby tells spencer if she wont tell him anything, he’ll “make it easy for her and find out himself” …. he disappears for awhile then reappears. Episode 3 x 12 … spencer is looking at a poster advertising the Halloween Train and sees Tobys reflection in the glass *foreshadow* … they have a love scene and Spencer asks Toby if he took a job out of town to get away from her… he says “trust me. Im right where I need to be” and in the betrayl episode, right before they show Tobys face, Mona is complaining about the plan not going right. Toby is sabotaging the A team from the inside.

dont believe me look it up… the clips are on youtube

I also think he may be the one having E Lamb give Spencer all these clues at Radley

And yes, Im a dork

- Carlos Pena (Big Time Rush) at last night’s Worldwide dedication to Jane 

Time: An Untimely Memorial

These are the words I’m going to speak at my Uncle’s Wake tomorrow. Just thought I’d share them on here. 

What can I say about my Uncle?

This is especially difficult because I did not expect to be speaking about him at his wake or  funeral this early in his life. That’s the problem with time. You never know how much you have left or what will change or stay the same. One thing that remains strongest even though time passes is love. And he gave a lot of love.

My sister and I grew up very spoiled nieces. We had an Uncle who loved us very much. Thinking back, I’ve lost count of all the bad movies we dragged him to, and all the loud music he’d enjoy with us growing up. I remember Collections of countless coins that he compiled for us because he wanted us to have them to remember him by and Trips to the mall to buy overpriced clothing we didn’t need, although he enjoyed those as much as we did; as we helped him pick out neck ties and sweaters. And yes, most recently I remember him telling my Dad “buy the girls the condo they want, call the realtor now. If now is too late, then call first thing tomorrow morning.”

Time kept moving and the world started to slowly take him away from us before what we felt was his time to go. He fought valiantly until the end. But as with all things, there’s a time to fight and a time to accept change. It’s difficult to imagine graduations, birthdays and weddings without him there, because we always expected that he would be.

Life is short and what will happen in time is unpredictable. The best we can do is to love as much as we can while we’re here. Often it’s thought that it’s the biggest things that matter…. Graduating and getting a big fancy degree or getting a big promotion at work. But it’s not. What’s most important is the memories you make with the people you love.

Our family has seen enough sickness and death this passed year to know that What matters most in the end is the small things. A favorite song. An Inside joke. Memories made on vacations or on ordinary days, just spending time together. A few hours spent at a casino, favorite foods and quiet conversations at home. No law degree, high paying job or fancy car will ever be more important than love and

 time, though it moves on and on even when we’d like it to stand still, can never erase the love my Uncle left behind.

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